I ain't no stinkin' werewolf!
by justsimplymeagain
Summary: Wolverine runs into a little bit of trouble while out on an errand. *A Halloween friendly fic more or less*


**A/N:** Heheh, I'm picking on Wolverine… And it's not my fault. I was trying to find a good story with Wolverine in it and happened to be listening to a werewolf tribute on youtube and then this challenge and the rest as they say is history…

Wolverine hated Halloween. Then again, he hated most holidays. He didn't mind Christmas so long as people left him alone rather then try to force him in red and green sweaters or use socks for treats. Wolverine wasn't a holiday kind of guy, never was for the longest time. Just like he wasn't the guy to sit down with brats. He just wasn't built that way.

But Halloween was worse!

This year the day went like this. First he would go out do what he had to get done, which was fine but it usually went downhill from there because of all of the decorations and setting up of things and spook houses or whatever they were called. There were old people and young people asking random strangers if they looked spooky, and some even commented that he was spooky or whatever.

Well, there was no fighting on the last one. You try being one of his enemies and coming face to face with him.

He decided that spooky wasn't a word, not in his vocabulary and thus spook wasn't either or any other variation of that word. It just wasn't in his vocabulary and shouldn't be in anyone's vocabulary. But no, it was unfortunately.

By the middle of his day, he was already in a foul mood and snarling at everyone who simply looked at him the wrong way or touched what he was going to grab. Kitty, Jubilee and the rest of them were so dead by the time he gets back to the mansion. The damn brats asked him, or more like pleaded with him and resorted to bribing him to go pick up candy and other supplies for their Halloween party. Waste of time.

His last stop unfortunately was much to his dismay a newly opened shop literally called,

'Halloween Spook Supplies and Trick or Treat Goodies'

"You gotta be shittin' me." Wolverine snarled to himself as he fixed his cowboy hat that he stole off of Sabretooth fair and square. At his defense Sabretooth practically dared him to take it! So he did. This hat however wasn't stolen in a fight that shed enough blood to fill a blood bank but in a card game. Growling to himself he ignored the squealing kids who looked like they already had too much candy already. Mothers were in the store cooing at baby costumes. He ignored them.

Picking up what he needed he tried to ignore the scents in this place, it stunk. And the sound of witch cackles and mock howls and booing. He hated the sound of the howls though; wolves would be very ashamed that their sounds were being used for such a stupid thing. A teenager was at the till. He already wasn't fond of her and noted her to be dressed in what he figured was suppose to be goth or something. And everything showed too much, and it wasn't because of what she was wearing. It was because he knew instinctively the girl was foolishly making herself a target to bigger meaner animals then he was.

Growling under his breath he stalked up to the till and she instantly gave him a bored look. Wolverine bit his tongue before he said something unkind. No need to bother the cooing mothers behind him with foul language. No one could say that he wasn't capable of being civil; it was circumstances that made it impossible!

The girlie's boyfriend by the smell of things came out; he could smell her all over him and him over her. The stale scent of sex gave them away. Wolverine said nothing, he didn't care. Unfortunately the scrawny guy stopped short and gawked at him. Literally. Wolverine involuntarily curled his lip; he hated being stared at like that. It made him feel studied, and him being studied never ended well. Just ask the people in Project: Weapon X.

"Why're you starin' at me." Wolverine finally snapped irritably, and felt himself getting angry at the fact that scrawny guy didn't seem fazed. And Sabretooth wanted to call him a runt, this guy might be taller then him but he was scrawny and weak looking. In Wolverine's opinion the guy openly staring at him is more of a runt.

"Like, Dude. Are you already dressed up for tonight?" The scrawny nobody asked, leaning his arms on the counter while the Goth girl shoved his things into a bag while watching the interaction with the same bored expression.

Wolverine blinked a couple of times. Was he just asked what he thought he was? Wolverine snarled angrily at that.

"Why the fuck would I dress up for this shit holiday?" Wolverine snapped angrily, it was a foolish thought. He didn't like this holiday as it was, why would he dress up for it?

"Cause like dude, you totally look like you could be a werewolf." The scrawny nobody calmly said, the punk was obviously used to being snapped and snarled at. Wolverine leant inward and forced the boy to stand up straight to avoid being face to face with him.

Wolverine ended up growling to himself, completely oblivious to the fact that the mothers hurried themselves out of the store muttering something about manners or whatever. Wolverine didn't care though. Not at the moment.

What he did care about though was that some nobody punk was implying that he should be or is a werewolf. Was it the hair? Or what? Maybe the way he curled his lip or the way he carried himself or something.

"I. Ain't. A. Damn. Werewolf." Wolverine said in a growl, and made sure his words were slowly said because this idiot obviously didn't hear too well. Or they were simply lacking in brain power, maybe he could get Jean or Chuck to check for him one of these days.

"You totally look like you could be one though." The man pushed, Wolverine felt himself vibrate. And silently he thanked the fact that Sabretooth wasn't here, he would never live this down and with their lifespan. He'll never be able to forget.

"I ain't." Wolverine insisted angrily, glaring. What was wrong with these idiots? There was plenty of people who knew to back off when he glares at them, but then again those were people who either had common sense or just didn't want to bother with him. Which was fine either way. Then there were those who didn't and that only had two categories, idiots like these two and people who could handle themselves against him. Like Sabretooth.

"I'm just saying." The scrawny guy insisted right back, a stubborn look in his eyes. Just great.

"I'm just saying! That I ain't no damn werewolf!" Wolverine snarled, true he might be acting a tad bit childish by sticking around and fighting with them. But they started it, and Wolverine was never one to let something go. He was stubborn that way. And at least there's no bloodshed. Yet. So no one could get mad at him for getting into a friendly fight.

"Why not?" The scrawny guy finally relented some, but only a bit. Wolverine opened his mouth to snap at him again, the favor was going to him finally and hopefully this disagreement would soon be over.

"You totally look like one…" The Goth girl finally spoke up; her voice was in a bored brawl. Wolverine felt grated by it. And he was even more aggravated by the fact that his big plan of this stupid situation being over unfortunately wasn't quite there yet.

"I ain't no stinkin' werewolf!" Wolverine ended up yelling, why did he have to be the nice guy today of all days! Why couldn't Kitty and Jubilee simply do things on their own then they would have to come to this damn Spook store and he could have been relaxing in a bar on his twentieth beer by now. It just wasn't fair, that's for sure. And not for the first time today, he was glad he didn't have to put up with Sabretooth. He would never be free from the memories of today if Sabretooth knew.

"You could be…" The Goth girl started when both of their eyes traveled downwards the second a sound echoed through the small store.

**Snikt! **

Screams echoed throughout the store, only belonging to the two behind the counter. Wolverine walked out of the store with the bag tightly held in an iron grip as he stalked towards his motorcycle that was waiting patiently for him. He felt a little better now that he made them see that he wasn't a werewolf, he was worse. And they were left cowering behind it. Wolverine was kind enough to put the closed sign on for them. Who said he couldn't be nice?

The two brats could finish buying supplies for their party at the end of the month themselves!

_~ SPOOK ~ _

Across from the store that was the source of entertainment, Sabretooth sat at a café wearing simple casual cloths that won't let him stand out. His blond hair cut short to about his shoulders and gloves to cover his claws, it was a chilly day so no one asked why he was wearing gloves while sitting outside with newspaper and cooling coffee. He heard the screams and chuckled, a grin showing off his sharpened fangs he couldn't hide even with his mouth closed.

There wasn't actually anything interesting in the newspaper, he just used it to hide his face from the runt who was too busy bickering with the two store keepers inside about being a werewolf. More like an ankle biter if you asked Sabretooth. Chuckling slightly, those two will think twice about fighting with a man who could probably melt paint with a glare and gut a bear like a fish. Not to mention they'll learn to especially not take money from a rather large blond looking to piss off a certain little glaring ankle biter.

It was a good day so far.


End file.
